As I sat reading my Facebook wall just after the holidays, I was taken aback by the number of people who were reaching out to others for help. I’ve long since known the holidays can be a difficult time for many people, but I was surprised to see that so many of my Facebook friends were unhappy. Desperately unhappy. I began to contemplate the state of happiness. What is it that makes us so unhappy, and how do we find happiness? I didn’t have these answers. So I turned to the angels for help.
My dearest angels, what is happiness and why are so many people unhappy?
This was their answer.
Happiness is a state of mind. We understand that there are biological factors that affect one’s mood. But dealt with properly – doctor’s care, medications, meditation, etc. – the state of mind of happiness comes from within.
To achieve happiness, it is necessary to let go of your negative emotions, to forgive those that have caused your negative emotions to exist and persist, and to allow yourself to forgive you. In order to be happy, you cannot harbor negative feelings towards anyone, especially yourself.
There are steps you can follow to allow yourself to be happy. When a negative emotion comes up, force it away. Replace it with a positive thought, which will bring about a positive emotion. When you hear yourself say, “I hate,” followed by whatever it is you hate, replace it with, “I love.” Then add whatever it is you love. It could be something as simple as, “I love walks in the rain.” Or, “I love chocolate. It makes me feel good when I eat it.” And something even more simple, “I love my pet,” naming whatever pet you have that you love.
When you see yourself getting caught up in the negative dialogue that goes on in your mind throughout the day. Shift. Move. Walk. Talk. Meditate. Think of something else. Do whatever it takes to change the negative thoughts to positive ones. The only way to remove a negative thought, is to replace it. Negative thoughts don’t go away on their own. They fester over time, and eventually take over your daily thinking.
If the methods listed above do not help, and your state of mind is dire, call 911, a suicide hotline, or a friend. Don’t ever be afraid to tell someone you need help. If your negative thinking is not dire but persistent, seek help from a doctor. And we recommend getting a pet, if possible. They make wonderful friends and companions, and they are so easy to talk to without fear of condemnation. Pets can be very uplifting to the soul.
Happiness is a learned behavior. Unhappiness is also a learned behavior. You didn’t just wake up one morning feeling unhappy – unless, of course, your unhappiness is a result of something biological. You became unhappy after having negative thoughts that persisted over time. Anything you learn can be unlearned. You unlearn an undesirable behavior by replacing it with a more desirable behavior.
And this may be the most important part of our message. Tell yourself every day that you love yourself. Tell yourself that you are important and necessary in God’s world. You are here for a reason. There is a plan for your life.
The key to sustaining happiness is finding what you love. Whatever that thing is. You may love helping others, reading, writing, photography, painting drawing, inventing things – there are so many things on your planet to love. Whatever makes you happy, do it. Put as much distance as possible between you and things you don’t love. When you regularly do things that make you unhappy, it facilitates unhappiness and negative thoughts and feelings. It is understood that everyone has to deal with things they don’t like to do. Work can be a chore. But, if you come home to something you love, do something you love, or just think about what you love, the unpleasant chores become more tolerable.
We love you and we want you to love yourselves. We want you to love one another. You are all children of God. And you should all be happy.